5 reasons why living in Vancouver is awesome this month. And by awesome, I mean crazy.

First of all, the average MAXIMUM temperature this month, so far, as recorded by the weather network, has been 21.8. Today I wore a sweater and a jacket to work. Yesterday, I kept them on all day. This is not what I expected from “temperate”

Next, there is the following:

July 20th: Public workers strike begins. Now in its 33rd day. I haven’t had a Yogen Fruz from the library in over a month. Also, any garbage not picked up by private companies has not been picked up at all. There is an alley with some dumpsters near my work that should only be approached wearing biohazard suits

August 9th: Gang related shooting in restaurant, Toronto-style.

August 10th: Man attacks three police officers with a chain, gets two of them in the head before the third shoots him between 6 and 9 times. Overkill?

August 16th: Driver loses control of huge container truck and drives it off a bridge. This was awful. Not just awful that he died either, but awful that people weren’t at all surprised that it happened, and more surprised that the bridge wasn’t just closed because another person was trying to jump.

I’m listening to the radio right now waiting for them to report on the army of rabid seals that has jumped the sea wall in Yaletown and is chowing down on the miniature malti-poos in the playground while their terrified owners abandon them to cower in their Land Rovers. The dachshunds remain mysteriously untouched.