The Road, Melbourne, Kelly, Koala, and the Second Coming of Christ

props for best title ever? (props from me if you actually wade through this beast of a post...)

So I'm just back from Melbourne, and a drive along Australia's South East coast. It was pretty amazing (pictures to follow when family does...), but here's a tip: If you're going to travel along the Great Ocean Road in the future, MAKE SURE YOU BOOK YOUR HOTELS IN ADVANCE. You can't just roll up and walk in, because they are BOOKED SOLID EVERY DAY. Which, you know, in a normal country, might prompt some savvy heads for business to say "Hmm, perhaps these towns need more hotels... perhaps I shall invest!" but no, they just turn people away. On the first night, by the third town (Bendigo had a rotary convention, Castlemaine wouldn't hear of the incestuosity of my brother and I sharing a bed - believe me it's not my idea of a good time - and the others were just plain full) I started making lame jokes:

Me: Is Jesus coming? Joshua, is there's something you want to tell us?
J: Yes, I am Jesus.
Me: What? No... you ALWAYS get to be Jesus. Mom tell Josh it's MY turn to be Jesus.
Dad: Either way I'm happy...

(actually, the only thing that really got said was the first one... my family just isn't that witty after 12 hours of driving)

And that's probably just about enough blaspheming for the Catholic relatives at the moment. Anyway, we got into a hotel just in time to eat dinner at a very expensive restaurant (is there any other kind?), and listen to a woman talk on her cell phone in a very high-pitched whiny excited annoying voice "OH MY GOOOOD KEEELLLY I HAVEN"T SEEN YOU IN AAAAAGES" I started laughing so hard I almost choked on my pasta, and then I laughed even harder when I saw her companion beat a hasty retreat "Shit got me a screamer, can't bring that home to mum." ahaa haa haa.

The second day, we spent, as the first one, staring rapt out the window trying to spot kangaroo (so far: roadkilled - 5, alive - nil). They have these signs with animal pictures saying "Kangaroo next 6km" and so on. We were already in Victoria when we saw our first "Koala next 2 km" to which my parents said "Oh yeah right, those things are so hard to see. How are we ever going to see one from a moving car?"

It was right about at that point that I sat forward and yelled "OH MY GOD I JUST SAW ONE YOU HAVE TO PULL OVER."

So yes, those pictures are coming too, haha.

And on to Melbourne:

It is really a beautiful city, it is I believe the Australian city of Lovers -- the f-ers are everywhere. There's like a makeout festival in every park. Nothing like being in the city of lovers with your parents eh? Awesome. But seriously, so nice.

And yesterday, coming home, I actually think I did see a kangaroo, a live one that is, but it was a bit small, might have been a wallaby? Oh what the f*** do I know -- in any case it was a marsupial of the hoppy variety I'm pretty sure.
I walked home from the bus station in the dark by myself and this morning I hear on the radio that "Police are investigating the bashing and robbery of two teenage girls in Civic last night." Yes, they actually said bashing. Civic is where I live. Thanks for fielding that one for me ladies.

So I woke up safe and sound this morning, rolled over and called Jess. Yeah, seriously, I didn't even get out of bed. I left the phone on my bedside table last night when I fell asleep. So I talked to her for an hour before I even got up, which was awesome, and much needed for both of us, and such a good way to start the day. I always have better days when I start them out talking to someone I miss so much. Now I've scrounged lunch rather unsuccessfully. I was listening to the radio this morning, just after I got off the phone they played "Peaches" by the Presidents of the USA... as the retro flashback, which first made me smile because it reminded me of singing along to that cassette with Jess when we were 12... and then I realized that a song I remember fondly when it first came out ON CASSETTE was a flashback song. And that means that time in my life has come -- when music I thought was cool is now retro-cool. Oh. My. God. Am I really that old? No. I'm not. Right?

I'm skipping class for the first time today. It is a civic holiday, probably half the class is skipping it. I really tried to get in to the building, I did, but it was locked, so obviously me and class today were not meant to be. Never mind, I've seen the Exorcist tonnes of times. I'm gonna go home and do some real work. Enough of this movie watching bullshit.

Love