Interior Designers

I am sitting in the apartment waiting for our new couch.
OUR NEW COUCH.
Which we shopped for at many big box stores. And which I am slightly nervous will not actually fit through the front door of our apartment.
Our BIG new couch.
It is green.

We have these fugue states right now where we walk through department stores with eyes reddened from too much recycled air and try to decide how to express ourselves through furniture. TM says this was our last big purchase. Damn I hope so. Because my constant refrain of "(insert home furnishing item here) does not define me/you as a person" is getting old even to me.
As it turns out, there is very limited humour to be found in housewares. Especially when it takes a couple three trips to a store to buy a tablecloth (to cover up the fact that one of them is very clumsy with nail polish remover *sob*).