OCASP is the dumbest thing ever

Off-campus Activity Safety Policy -- Only at Queen's.

So the thing that is late to be handed in to the IPO is this 6 PAGE "Safety Planning Record" which is the stupidest piece of bureaucratic crap I've ever had the misfortune to wrestle with. The second page is all blank with spaces for you to "List identified hazards associated with activities or environment (e.g. extreme heat or cold, wild animals, endemic disease, firearms, explosives, transportation, crime, violence, political instability)," -- to which my mother exclaimed "You're not going to the States for christ's sake," so you see where I get it from -- "and risk-management measures planned or taken for eliminating or reducing risks to acceptable levels. Please see the attached examples. Append additional pages as required." -- to which I exclaimed "F*** you!"
I left this page till the very last, and was going to leave it blank, but then I thought they might make me do it again. So this is what I wrote:

Hazard Identification:
Dangerous Animals (it is Australia after all, the 11 most poisonous snakes on earth and all that)

Risk Analysis:
Low risk. I don't forsee being attacked by anything.

Risk-Management Plan:
I will learn which spiders to kill on sight, and which to befriend. I will avoid swimming with sharks/crocodiles. I will learn to identify the dangerous snakes. I will become a faster runner.


Put that in your f-ing pipe OCASP.