Time Police

Headline News: Time Police to Change the Setting of the Sun

"...don't you guys wish there was a time police who could give time tickets for moving too much under the speed limit? Seriously, this hour is doing 30 in a 50. It's obstructing traffic, damnit, and I want justice."

So began the development of the Time Police, a regimented body of defense dedicated to the regulation and control of the flow of Time, and those persons guilty of Time-related offences (see Article 2.7 of the Time Offenders Identification Manual). Under this new regime, time would never again a) fly, b) stand still, c)be wasted, or d)be turned back. Although the TP's introduction was well recieved by most, some select groups were not as impressed with the proposed control. Most notably, the Executive Directo of the Organization for the Equal Treatment of Plastic Surgeon's had this to say, "The Time Police will be the end of my profession!"

Please see TIME on page D12