SLEDGE POOPIES

Can't you just tell from the title that you are going to LOVE this post??

What I'm about to tell you hinges on two stories.
The first is that I have a problem being heard. Either I have a hard time judging the volume of my own voice and thus opt for the lowered option, or - as I prefer to believe - everyone ever (and especially my mother) is deaf.
The second is that when my brother turned 9, we were in Washington D.C. and for his birthday among other things he got this toy called Orbit Balls which was basically three balls on a string which you could do tricks with much like a yoyo. It was very cool, plus it glowed in the dark, which gave it extra cool factor. My brother and I would lock ourselves in the bathroom and play with it in the dark FOR HOURS. And then, my brother did something stupid, which he often did at that age (AT THAT AGE?), and put the Orbit Balls in a bag of chocolate chip cookies which then got smashed to bits for one reason or another, and the orbit balls were irretrievably stained brown by the chocolate.
Which all brings us up to today. There are trees here in Australia (for the life of me I don't know what they are) whose seedpods come in these little fluffy balls. While waiting at the bus stop today my brother found three of these attached in much the way the Orbit balls had been, and started playing with them saying "orbit, orbit, orbit" (I still say we should have him checked for ADHD), which of course reminded me of the story and so I said, "Hey Josh, remember when you stuck the orbit balls in the bag of chocolate chip cookies and they turned brown and we couldn't ever get them clean again?" My brother said yes he did, and it was such a shame. Meanwhile my mother was standing between us staring back and forth at each of us. Finally she said, "Wait, wait, did you just say orbit balls in a bag of sledge poopies? What the hell are you talking about?"
I laughed, and laughed and laughed, and cried a little bit... and then I repeated myself and asked, "How the hell did you get SLEDGE POOPIES from CHOCOLATE CHIP COOKIES?"
"Well why would I think you were saying orbit balls and chocolate chip cookies, that doesn't make sense," she said.
"But SLEDGE POOPIES does?" I asked incredulously.
"Well, I just wanted to demonstrate that you don't enunciate clearly," she said a bit sullenly. I then tried to push her hair away from her ears, which she fended off by flapping her hands.
As my father often says these days, we spend way too much time together. Thankfully for them in 10 days I'll be out of their hair for a while. haha.