Is there methadone for Fructis?

I think I've begun to realize that my hair is actually addicted to Fructis. It's not happy if I use anything but. It's been on it for 2 years now and it's just hooked. This morning at the breakfast table I brought it up, and my brother said "Yeah, it's like heroin for hair -- Hairoin!" and I said no, it was more like speed for hair, but sadly my analogy had no snappy word amalgamation pun.