Wednesday, April 02, 2008

Auto-Im-Mutiny

Yesterday I declared myself to be ill. I wrapped a scarf around my neck, pulled a blanket over myself on the couch and allowed TM to take over all dinner prep, and pampering etc. (Not that I DON'T let him tend to me when I'm not ill, but lately, as he's been spending almost every free moment studying for four GIANT exams that are coming up in the middle of April, and since I have an inordinate amount of free moments and have no such demands, I have been taking responsibility for most of the domestic goings-on around here, which I feel is only fair.)

Back to my being ill. Because I'm not ill per se. I have actually been going through a fairly stressful week for one who is unemployed. Simply because for the past week I have been in discussions to become EMployed, and my own obsessive nature causes this to be the subject that occupies my mind in every waking hour (and some unwaking).

Still though, this stress isn't the direct reason for my "illness," but it is the indirect cause. You see, when I get stressed out, my body attacks itself, and I get ulcers. Not stomach ulcers, thank god (although with the amount of ibuprofen I'm taking at the moment for pain management it's not an impossibility), but canker sores. Lots and lots of canker sores. So many that I can't eat solid food any more. So many that the glands in my neck have swollen. So many that I haven't slept more than 4 hours together in the last three days. So many that when I get up in the morning, it hurts to speak.

Yesterday, I finally steeled myself, picked up the flashlight, and investigated the inside of my mouth. Not only do I have one on the inside of each cheek, right above where my wisdom teeth can make painful contact with them every time I close my mouth, I also have three (THREE!) on one side of my tongue, in a neat little line, where I vaguely remember accidentally biting myself on the weekend.

I have NEVER had canker sores this bad. They are completely incapacitating my ability for activity or rational thought. And so yesterday I decided to just act like I'm sick with a cold. I will be spending today drinking fluids, including copious amounts of lemon, ginger and honey, trying to rest, and trying above all to destress my system.

Thankfully, a call should come in this morning which will at least put an end to any doubt I'm in about my employment status. I have a feeling that might go a long way towards clearing these things up.

1 Comments:

Blogger Alex said...

oh no! that sounds so very painful. i hope they clear up soon.

now for the matter of potential job offers...spill!

7:14 p.m.  

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